Page 9

By Jack Joseph Smith

Mr. Clean Caribbean Sea Suggestion: Instead of the astro projection, Animal is pulled from the ocean by men (Hawaiian) who have reached him far out from the shore through the use of surf boards. (The rescue of Frank Sinatra as an example) He is brought back to the island, and there informed that he has been saved by a report from the Sleeping Beauty. (Her named should be changed from Lithia to the Brown Sleeping Beauty in terms of how Animal refers to her) This situation would make it possible to cut her decussion with the administrator. The opening would then be his directly coming out of the mountains, with no flash backs to her due to the explanation given by the Hawaiian men on the beach after his rescue. At his point a helicopter could be in the sky (already called) to take him to Honolulu. From there the story continues to Los Angeles. Some more bullshit that I'm not going to do.. Ain't Eating

Original Scan

AI Interpretation

GPT

This revision note proposes replacing an astro projection with a concrete ocean rescue by Hawaiian men, then moving Animal quickly from Honolulu to Los Angeles.

The page is mostly construction note rather than finished narrative. It shows the author trying to simplify the opening mechanics, rename or reframe the Sleeping Beauty figure, cut an administrative discussion, and keep the plot moving. The irritated handwritten bottom note makes the page feel like an argument with the draft itself.

Claude

Pure production note: a 'Suggestion' that instead of 'the astro projection,' Animal be 'pulled from the ocean by men (Hawaiian)' on surf boards - cross-referenced to 'The rescue of Frank Sinatra as an example' - then flown by helicopter to Honolulu and on to Los Angeles. It also proposes renaming Lithia 'the Brown Sleeping Beauty' and cutting 'her decussion with the administrator.' The bottom hand annotation, 'Some more bullshit that I'm / not going to do.. / Ain't Eating,' lets the author sabotage his own plan in the margin.