Page 115

themselves, hit the ground. But it's not only the grass of Mount Lebanon I have used as my battle ground; the downtown streets and the barren cement have also been a part of my nighttime pleasure. One night they stripped me bare and worked me over in a dungeon. Then they threw me in a dark cell, as I laughed at them and pretended I was Marlon Brando. My old man hits harder than that. That's pretty original, eh Daniel? We both laughed on the sick side of a smile. His face was intense and waited to speak, but I went on. O'Dandy and his absurdity. Who gives a fuck is his statement about himself. And he looks upon the world as someone to shove it to. The world is one big cut. Men and women with their pants down, and the men turned around. The whiskey goes down so fast, so fast. My head is lonely. I took the richest of Mount Lebanon girls away from her husband, during a time when they were killing each other. I had no right. You probably heard about it. It dosen't matter. She is so beautiful and afraid with her two children and all. Her father is so rich. He bought them a fancy home and a car. Gave him a job, and paid the bills. He threw parties. It happened on New Years eve. The power could not be cast aside. Anything for a moment of song, and now I have sinned gravely. They have no place to go, and they will never touch again. Where did the father think he was taking them with his money. Worse than decadence Daniel, Death. The spirit of booze and false laughter. My mirror is with me when I am walking. No cry from my rambling is unheard in its distant weeping. What does she do now with her eyes drooping under her streight strands of unsmoothed hair. No love to touch her. I have been her medium for oblivion, I sometimes look around under the womb of my covers and wonder where I am. Three days on a drunk and you just can't see yourself begin any kind of beginning. All through